Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Dudefile #11 - The Weekend Away (part two)

Hi DW:

A follow-up just to thank you for your answer. [DW Note: See Dudefile #11– The Weekend Away] I'm feeling about a million times better about this than I was a few months ago, and am SO GLAD I didn't show up on his doorstep. In fact, this guy has since moved, and I don't know where to, which I feel is probably the universe's way of backing up your advice.

As a nice little bonus, I especially liked seeing all the vindictive comments in response to the post. It's one thing to hear my girlfriends tell me he's being a jerk and I should just forget it, but it's their job to say that. Hearing random internet people call him a total jerk, a douche, completely disrespectful and cruel...somehow that just really helps, you know?

And you should know, too, that I am being exactly the same (I like myself!) with several other dudes and they do seem to find me the bee's knees :)

Keep up the awesome work--
HRoOP



Hi HRoOP,

Thanks for the follow-up. And really, this should be a lesson for everybody. Never underestimate the power of calling someone a douchebag. It’s quite a word, really. Great particular meaning, and phonetics that are right up there with shampoo. Sham. Poo. Say it slowly and see if it doesn’t make you smile. (Sham-poo.) Too bad nobody would buy anything called Douchebag Shampoo, actually. It would be the best product name ever.

Anyway, the DW is glad you’re feeling better. Sounds like you’ll definitely have more pleasant experiences with the dudes going forward. And not only because it would be hard to do worse than the (everyone together now…) douchebag from The Weekend Away, but because you’re in a mindset to take a dude on only if he’s worth your time. As the ubiquitous Henry Rollins once said, and the DW is paraphrasing, “Just because someone tries to hand you a pile of sh*t doesn’t mean you have to take it.” And that holds true no matter how charming a dude may be. Well done.

And the DW was pleasantly surprised how much your dude riled up the masses, as well. Most important, the DW reader angry mob with torches beat-down of this dude was cathartic. Also, though, the reactions made up a little bit for the DW not being as explicitly condemning of certain things himself, in particular the dude’s decision to take the scenic route south on the Pantyline Highway, even though the DW feels the dude already had doubts about where things were headed once you got back. Even if one wanted to give the dude the benefit of the doubt about asking you for The Weekend Away in the first place, the greedy S.E.X. (and subsequent no-call cowardly B.S.) not being called out as a little more reprehensible was a blemish on the DW’s usual greatness.

Hopefully, you won’t need the DW for any of the new dudes, but feel free to write if something comes up or just for further updates.

Sham-Poo,

The DW

2 comments:

Mallory said...

Commercial starts with the music from the musical South Pacific, “I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outta My Hair".

Spokesperson:
Douchebag Shampoo, for when you just want to wash that man right out of your hair!

Brought to you by The Dude Whisperer who not only provides advice about dude problems, but products that help remedy the situation!

Douchebag Shampoo is also a good solution for dealing with other Douchebags in your life.


Dude, you came up with a viable product, an idea that you could expand into an entire product line. Do you think I have a future in advertising/marketing?

thedudewhisperer@yahoo.com said...

The DW thinks you have the brightest of futures. In fact, once the Dude Whisperer media empire gets off the ground, you're hired!