Friday, April 4, 2008

From the DW's Mail: More 10,000 B.C.

Dear DW,

No dude problems, but needed to say that you were spot on about 10,000 bc. I just slogged through it with friend tonight and I have to say you forgot to mention the lead guys hot body. Let's face it some movies are only worth it for the eye candy. When I was invited to the movie I forgot about reading your comment until about 10 min into the movie. Thankfully my friend is just as snarky as I am and we had a 'giggle fest'.

movie buff

Hi movie buff,

First of all, congratulations on no dude problems! Aside from the Nigerian bankers and Lottery Board officials who write the Dude Whisperer, you’re the first to be dude copasetic.

Glad you managed a giggle fest, too. What a spectacle! And thanks for pointing out the eye candy angle. The DW, in fact, totally missed how hot the cavedude’s body was, and, as you can see, your letter was the inspiration of the latest polls over there to the left.

Incidentally, the dude must have been more than your average hotness to overcome the Burning Man meets Geico aesthetic he was burdened with, not to mention the fourth grade school play caliber script. Perhaps his Hotness Overpowering Ridiculousness might be a good way to explain how a dude can look at Maxim and enjoy the hotness of a young woman even though she’s in a fur-lined waterbed with a torn Hooter’s t-shirt, fake freckles, no pants, cowboy boots, and a piece of straw in her mouth. Not that the DW has ever seen Maxim.

It’s really not surprising, though, that the DW missed the cavedude’s appeal to women. In general, the DW knows nothing about what women find attractive in a dude. When he guesses something obvious like washboard abs, it turns out to be something utterly esoteric like upper lip or wrists. And when he guesses something girly like sensitive eyes or kind voice, it turns out to be the straight on f*#k me washboard abs. Whatever. Uncle. The DW gives up.

As for the cavegirl, the DW still hasn’t figured out if she was hot. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. And it was also distracting how much she reminded the DW of this famous National Geographic cover.

And remember, less than a month til Iron Man!

Happy schlock movie watching,

the DW

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