Saturday, March 29, 2008

Poll Results #3

Has anybody heard anything? Is that it? The whole thing is over? Really?

Wow, Ashley Alexandra Dupre and Eliot Spitzer, we hardly knew ye. Okay, so you introduced us to The Emperor's Club, er, The Emperor's Club and we found out the Governor of New York had forked over 80 grand on escorts over the years. That’s a pretty good start, but where’s the deets, people? We know Bill Clinton has a curved wiener for heaven’s sake and the best you can give us is this-

"Client 9, according to another woman associated with the Emperor's Club, "would ask you to do things that, like, you might not think were safe." There was no elaboration."

Booo-riing. Where’s the wide-stance? Where the certified de-gaying? Where’s Jessica Hahn? By the way, a more complete account of “Client 9” related communications is available on huffingtonpost, where this quote came from, and elsewhere, but have a strong cup of coffee at the ready because that’s as racy as it gets.

Seriously, though, all Eliot Spitzer wanted to do was go without a rubber? And failed? Lame. You’d think a dude who can get himself elected Governor of the third most populous state in the Union and who just dropped $4,300 would be more persuasive than your average pimply prom date about going au naturale. Not to mention more adventurous. Really, that’s it?

And the DW is sure his readers are disappointed as well because below is how Poll #3 turned out. As always, to all who voted.


Which would you most like to know more about regarding the Eliot Spitzer resignation story?

The new governor of New York, David A. Paterson – 15%
What Mr. and Mrs. Spitzer will do next – 3%
What is next for call girl/singer Ahley Dupre – 0%
What Spitzer wanted in the sack – 82%

The DW does admit, actually, some surprise at the landslide. Not that sex winning a poll is that shocking, but what a margin this was. 3 percent curiosity about the two women who, in their own ways, got f*#ked in this situation? Shame on you all, you Britney Spears gawkers. It is because of you that this country is going straight to hell. Or so say the folks who are most likely to father illegitimate children or proposition a minor.

As a sort of news sorbet to cleanse the palate, a few quick links for the noble 15% who wanted to know about David A. Paterson. The DW’s favorite tidbit was that the new Governor is legally blind, yet plays basketball. Do you suppose it’s awkward being the dude who has to guard the Governor in the Capitol pickup game? And do you suppose the first line of this story from the American Foundation for the Blind was intentionally pun-ny or got someone fired?

Will someone just give Ashley Alexandra Dupre a recording contract already? And tell her to respond to the DW’s MySpace friend request while you’re at it.

Best of luck with the dudes. The DW is almost caught up with mail, so keep the questions and comments and how-do-you-dos coming,

the DW

1 comment:

tenpolaroids said...

hey dude whisperer! thanks for your comments- glad to meet you out here in the wild world of blogging. I think you're high up there on the awesome scale, so keep 'em coming.
nikka (tenpolaroids)